stained

smudged
under several coats
all dialogue unmemorable
what remains
seen on vacation
memory of a day
youthful steam
Always playing or not knowing
playing
sleep over?
maybe
mid-sleep-faking fumblings
start with a spoon
an arm
a hand
moving slightly out of place
anticipating no reaction

a welcome push
down
rewards that renew
heat
sinuewy
more pushing toward, against
(but these are the games)
Pot limits
odds
favor
always wanting
always waiting
Deflating

In breath and rating
Someday will be never retribution
And then maybe that next morning
maybe just one day after
school
clean as a dirty little whistle
hair up cleopatra
towel wrapped above breasts and so adult
begging pleading eluding daring neverminding
a swipe
from where it all goes down
one finger tip
and a snide remark
A time when nothing (no war or famine) could halt the progression
nothing hiding the glowing eyes
no brush no cover no reason
but still
It's not enough to change that feeling
with one finger
as a statement that would last still today
the blood of your fathers and mothers
the blood of your children and grandchildren
remain on the wall
my mother's house
to this day
so when on vacation
with my wife
laugh
tell story
someone brought me
nearly all the way there
but just shy enough
to stand eye to eye
lonely longing; nervous
not touching
well
maybe a hug

a press and release

and then years

coats of paint

a rusty dot

an heirloom

if you ever need it